Out With the Ladies, In with the Babies

Last night, I went out with actual adults.

I left the kids in the capable hands of Charles and we headed to the newest, trendiest restaurant in town.  Where we waited an hour and a half to be seated (which was almost an hour longer than we expected the wait to be, and which they tried to make right with a free round of drinks - which of course we did not waste!).

Yum.  And the bar kept changing colors, so that was cool, too.

It was great fun.  A much-needed diversion from my nightly routine (which mostly includes cranky kids, a nursing baby, a chaotic bath time and other standard nighttime parenting drama).

I looked around the bar and saw lots of "old" people - adults who clearly weren't wondering if their babies were at home missing them, because their babies were no doubt grown-up and living their own lives (or at least old enough to stay home without a sitter).  I wondered, "what's that like?" as if I hadn't been able to stay out as long as I wanted just a few short years ago (it's amazing how perspective changes once you have kids - I literally had years and years of "me" time, years of staying out until the wee hours of the morning and not having to answer to anyone...but after just 3.5 years of parenting, I can barely remember those days!).

I know those days will be here again before I know it.  The days when my kids are grown and I'm out with friends checking my phone constantly not to see if Charles is texting me with some emergency at home that he absolutely cannot handle without me (which never happens) but to see if one of my kids might have sent me a text to check in and say hello.  The days when I will be able to wait for an hour and a half for a table at a trendy restaurant and not once think about how this is cutting into the rest of the night and how the baby probably needs to nurse soon.  Just a few short years ago, no one needed me - and now, they do.

Already, things are getting easier.  Jack is fine without me, and Claire is getting older and the intensity of her needs is lessening.

I both long for the time when I can skip out of the house unnoticed and go about my business and fear it, as well.  As I snuggled in to bed last night against Claire, who's already a year old, I realized - again - that these days are fleeting.

Nights out with friends are rejuvenating and an important piece to keeping "me" intact. I need to get out of the house without having to pack a diaper bag every now and then, you know?  But pretty soon, I won't be packing diaper bags.  I'll be throwing back packs into the car as we head off to school, then loading up sports equipment as we head to another game, and then before I know it, packing up the car to drive my babies off to college.  And then I'll have nothing but time on my hands.

I guess I'm not sure where I am going with this.  I started this post with a lighthearted topic in mind, to be sure - I was going to tell you all that for my big girls' night out I wore a shirt Charles bought me at Costco (because that's something I am pretty sure I would have laughed at a few years ago).  But instead, this turned into a rambling post about how fast my kids are growing up (which seems to be a common theme on this blog, lately) and how before I know it, I'll be an "old" person sitting at the bar in a trendy restaurant waiting for my kids to text me and tell me they love me.  How depressing is that?!?!  Okay, maybe that's a little bit extreme!  Ha.

The moral of this story is, in some convoluted way, to get out and enjoy your "me" time - as moms, we really need that - but don't wish away these early and intense years with your babies.

I am pretty sure it's going to be harder when they're teenagers.

Am I the only one who gets all sad and weepy thinking about how fast her kids are growing up?

And if you want to read another post just like this one, in which I lament on how my kids are growing up before my very eyes and then try to encourage myself to brave another day of kids who do not sleep, I have one for you right here.